EP02 FULL：Khi đàn ngỗng trời trở về, các hiệp sĩ chiến đấu với đội mạnh nhất

EP02 FULL：Khi đàn ngỗng trời trở về, các hiệp sĩ chiến đấu với đội mạnh nhất

Boss Our shop is in its busiest season. How about we put together an awesome team to really get our staff’s creativity flowing? That’s a great idea. Come here. Come here. Gotta look cool. Unfettered—ah, do not mock my madness. Sword in hand, I wander the mortal realm. Judge good from evil. Tell right from wrong. Discern loyalty from betrayal. What kind of hero’s summons is this? Why should I even bother showing up? Nothing is better than having you by my side Carefree—let them laugh at my madness if they wish Wandering the world, sword in hand Plucking a flower, sharing a smile—never weary of such moments Fate draws near and slips away, as time flies like an arrow At ease and carefree, with my brothers beside me The way of the hero—only those who walk it truly understand The principle: fear no authority, master both light and shadow. Strike down the strong, aid the weak. The road ahead will surely be fraught with countless perils. But always keep this in mind: Heroism knows no rank; martial arts know no true good or evil. Let nature take its course. Man can triumph over destiny. Alright. Just a theory. You figured all that out? It was obvious. You carry it, it’s heavy. I don’t want it either. And it’s so ugly. Just start grooving and you’ll feel happy. This show is brought to you by Mengniu Real Fruit Granules—packed with real fruit bits. Exclusively sponsored by Mengniu Real Fruit Granules. Hello, everyone. I’m Li Dan. Welcome to our Laughs General Store. Today’s opening is absurd, with a whiff of tension in the air. Right from the start, Zhi Sheng and I were fighting over that so-called “Most Awesome” trophy. The craftsmanship is just hideous. We both wanted to let the other take it. Go ahead, you take it. No, you take it. But today, we have to compete for it, don’t we? To boost everyone’s enthusiasm at work, and to increase everyone’s motivation, so today we’re going to start the selection for the best team. You could become the leader of the snack bar. Sounds like a lot of work. And you’ll even go down in the snack bar’s history. That’s actually pretty embarrassing. Each side represents their own team. I guess that’s how it’s split up. That’s true. Our side is the cast of “Yan Hui Shi” (“When the Wild Geese Return”). Come on up, Duling. Hi everyone, I’m Chen Duling. I play Zhuang Hanyan in the show. Welcome. Hi everyone, I’m Xin Yunlai. I play Fu Yunxi. Welcome, Yunlai. You guys have a team too… Our team is “Xia Ke Xing Bu Tong” (“The Way of the Chivalrous Doesn’t Work”). “Xia Ke Xing Bu Tong.” We’re a drama crew. Can’t you tell? You’re the “Bu Tong” (Doesn’t Work) part, right? They’re mainly the “Xia Ke” (Chivalrous) part. Let’s see who’s the lead here. You’re probably the fourth male lead, right? Go ahead and introduce yourself. How do I say this… I’m having a bit of trouble speaking. Then just keep going like that. Like this. I’m the leading man. I never imagined I’d end up doing promo for a play. No worries. Because your opening monologue was all improvised. It was only half live, anyway. First up, that’s me. You know, Xu Zhisheng here… Xu Zhisheng. In “The Hero’s Journey Doesn’t Work,” I play— And there’s even a sound effect like this. If you like it, we can keep playing it. I actually enjoy it. I like it. In “The Hero’s Journey Doesn’t Work,” he fights for the weak and ends up admired by thousands— the great hero Gou Lingfeng. Hello everyone, I’m Fan Jingyi. In “The Hero’s Journey Doesn’t Work,” I play the Hero of a Hundred Flowers, Ma Yingdan. Hello everyone, I’m Wang Shuai. In “The Hero’s Journey Doesn’t Work,” I play the Sword Saint’s son, the Sword Hero Zhuge Heng. Welcome, everyone. I’m just the scholar— my main job is to dish out their gossip. But Mian did an amazing job in it. He even stole the spotlight from me at one point. What’s there to brag about? It was a close call, but that’s just how it goes sometimes. Isn’t that just something that happens? But I have a question for Li Dan: I became the team leader because I’m the male lead. So why did Yang Di get to be team leader? I was planning to keep this secret to myself and just keep it in my heart. After all, it was just part of the show’s publicity campaign. They said, “They made me say it.” But honestly, no one forced you—you didn’t have to say anything. Hang on a second, when I saw the official announcement for this show, “The Swordsman’s Way Doesn’t Work,” the moment it was announced, I thought, “Why does this look so familiar?” I remembered mentioning it in my chat history, so I went back to check. Sure enough, back in 2017—yeah, 2017— this production team actually approached me to play Gou… Gou Ling… Gou Lingfeng. He was just asking for it. Everyone knows how busy I was in 2017. I was swamped. I told them to wait a bit longer. That crew was gone. But the others waited for me. So for that show, the male lead was always chosen based on the same standards— they never changed. The criteria for casting were always consistent. How does it feel to be my stand-in? A replacement. Not really. A replacement. Same here. I just got scared for Jingyi thinking about it. What do you mean? She managed to avoid Di-ge, only to end up with me. What kind of luck is that? Two rounds of “disaster.” Who should we give the honor of being today’s best team to? Who should it go to? I think there’s a competition round, isn’t there? Everyone practiced hard on their own for a bit. Duling, We have to do something really impressive, don’t we? If I’m not mistaken, there’s a pay-per-view segment, right? If I’m not mistaken. You’re not going to dance again, are you? You’re always here for this segment. Chen Duling’s dancing is just incredible. Absolutely amazing. It must be members-only to watch. I’m looking forward to it. I’m a bit embarrassed. The two of us— Yunlai will dance too. A duet. Cue the music! Yunlai The two of them are clearly in sync. But somehow, it always feels like Yunlai is a step behind. Not sure why. Do you have to pay for this part? Paywall. Turin He dances even worse than you do! You have to pay if you want to skip this part. Isn’t that right? Pay to remove this part. No, that’s a separate fee. Those two are so cute. What do you think? A dance we’ve carefully prepared. I feel like just standing here already feels like a win. We’ve already got this. Bring it on. My little brother’s got skills. My little brother’s got something special. Xinhao He’s prepared something surreal. Magic! Magic! First, pick a card for me. And remember which one it is. Then hand it back to me. Give it to you? Yes. Then, My hands are shaking. Yeah, I’m a bit nervous. Show the card. Is this your first time doing this? Chen Xinhao This is the first time so many people are watching me do this. We don’t have to watch, you know. We can always edit this part out, too. So, do you want us to watch or not? Xinhao, Let’s see if it worked this time. This isn’t the right one at all. That’s wrong. This really isn’t the right one. Give them a round of applause! Impressive! Let me help you find it. I can’t even find it now. Look how busy your crew is right now. They even have to clean up this prop for you? What kind of production is this? What kind of crew is this? What kind of style is this? What is all this, anyway? What are you all doing squatting here today? There you go again. We’re just cleaning up. Aren’t we saving you trouble? It’s all over the place. I can tell. Your fighting spirit today is off the charts. Really? If you’re being tough, then I’ll go easy. I like this kind of competitive vibe. How could you tell? As the shop’s most mysterious warehouse, I’ve picked the top teams today to come here for some training. Everyone, get ready for the surprise I have in store for you. Thanks. Is the director here? He talks just like that. Is it the guy with the blond hair? Yeah? He’s at the back. The main thing is, he doesn’t pause for breath when he talks. You think he’s finished, but then he suddenly keeps going. It feels a bit flat. He still tries to interact with us. Okay, see you in a bit. You can feel the tension between those two teams. Even our mysterious warehouse can’t wait any longer. The teams that made it through today’s selection will enter the warehouse to take on the ultimate mysterious challenge. Next, we’ll see which team is better at making fans’ wishes come true. Who’s got the edge. Next, the audience will make their wishes. And True Fruit Milkshake will help deliver the luck. Hi everyone, Where floral scents meet juicy fruit bits, A little bottle of happiness. You get to enjoy the fruit bits, and if you’re lucky, you might win a prize. Get ready to welcome the fans and their love—packed with real fruit bits! Let’s pick some cards— just choose any three. I’ll take the one in the bottom right corner, then. Let’s head over. Come on, let’s go. We’ve picked three wish cards from fans. Alright, let’s see the first wish. Mine says— That fishing spot Yeah, I know it I’ve filmed that before How about we make it look a bit nicer here? Sure Let’s play some romantic music Dige I want this kind of Dige too. That’s really gross. I’m the male lead. The main thing is, I feel like I don’t really fit in with their crew. The male lead can do a princess lift. Let’s take a break. Let’s give the audience a break too. Let’s show everyone something nice to look at. Chen Duling’s outfit is kind of… Let’s cover her with a blanket. Alright, let’s do our princess-carry squats. Five reps. Make sure you can handle it. Don’t just toss her onto the stage. He can handle it. Keep an eye on her. Still a bit shy. Five. Wait, I’m here to promote the show too, so why am I feeling so envious of the other team? Zhisheng, do you need a blanket? Do you need a blanket to cover your face? Then we can just We can hug however we want and look around, okay? Come here. Do you need one? Do you all want one? Yeah. A hug. Anyone’s fine. My final wish is to ask everyone to please watch the show. I’m speaking under my real name here. My name is Xu Zhisheng. My ID number is 3708—just kidding! Hello everyone, I’m Xu Zhisheng. My dear princesses, please check out the show. Both teams will take part in three rounds of the Bull Power Challenge. The winning team of each round gets to draw a card from the main prize pool. The winning team will go there to draw their card. The losing team can only draw from the minor prize pool. Based on the points revealed on the card they draw, their team’s Bull Power ranking will increase. The team that ranks higher on the leaderboard will earn extra time to promote their show. They will also proceed to the warehouse of unknown fate, for the ultimate challenge. The winner will be crowned the ultimate team. The theme for our first round of the Bull Power Challenge is Here are the rules: All members stand at the starting point. A set of pinyin initials will be announced on the spot. Everyone can then race to the answer area to buzz in. To answer, you must come up with and act out a word based on the given initials. Each successful answer earns one point. The team with the highest score at the end wins. Boss Li, does just one person go up to act, or do two people need to work together? It’s up to you. You can even bring your whole family if you want. After all, your whole family shares one face. I will now announce the first set of questions. Three, two, one. Qiang Little Qiang Huh? Hey, what are you doing over there? Isn’t this the one? What’s your team’s word? Yang Di! Alright, good, hurry back! Wow, she really is… How come she’s on fire now? What is this? A fishway. This path here. Let’s go. This is the path that fish swim through. No, that doesn’t count. I’ll just eat a little, just a little bit. That’s fine. Alright, one, two, three. Sure. I’m a guide dog. Gou Lingfeng, Hero Gou Thank you for your performance. Very good. Raindrops are falling outside. It’s rather romantic. One slash. Collapse. Another slash. Mr. Ma Dong’s eye bag surgery looks really good. This one’s okay. We have more. Baa. Sheep stomach. That counts. Sheep have stomachs. Sheep stomach. Can I smack her? If sheep stomach counts, then fish maw should count too. Yeah, I don’t think that’s allowed. Sheep stomach. Sheep stomach, sheep stomach is fine. Sheep stomach suddenly makes sense. Get out of here. Fish maw. Fish maw, I eat that. What else is there? Duck stomach. What other stomachs are there? Sheep stomach, fish maw. Your turn, Xinhao. Reading, that’s acceptable. You’re knowledgeable, little brother. This one’s knowledgeable too. This doesn’t count, there’s no performance. What Xu Zhisheng just did doesn’t count. No performance. We’ll perform right away. Alright, it worked this time. This time, I get to perform. India. Alright. Welcome to India. Okay. Time’s up. Great, that was excellent. Alright, next we’ll move on to the next level of assessment. I’ll switch to a new set of initials. I’ll also give everyone a scenario to perform. Earlier, you all came up with your own ideas. The next scenario is: When you hear this word, what comes to mind? Three… Two… One… The boss said everything’s sold out—guess we need to buy some “guangpan” now. Get it? “Guangpan” sounds like “sold out”! What do you want to buy? What do you guys sell? We sell “guangpan”—as in, we’re sold out! “Guangpan”? (Like, sold out?) We’re just making a pun here. We’re not actually talking about CDs, you know. We still have some left—just kidding! Hey, are you here yet? Boss, my food’s here. Hey, what’s going on with your desk? Sorry, boss. My vinegar’s here. The vinegar’s here. My vinegar. The vinegar’s here. Why is it at the office? Because I brought extra food. What’s this about? Got the vinegar. Alright, got it. The vinegar’s here. Alright, got it. But didn’t everyone misunderstand the question? There needs to be a response, not just the boss talking. The boss says, “You’re late.” I say, “Sorry, it won’t happen again.” Chao Yue’s response is the most accurate. It’s like when your boss messages you in the middle of the night. Then I have to come up with a reply. Let me think about it a bit more. The boss says, “I can’t believe how clueless you are.” I say, “Sorry, it won’t happen again.” The boss said, “I had fish for dinner tonight,” “and got a fish bone stuck in my throat.” I said, “Okay, I’ll go buy some vinegar right away.” “The vinegar’s here.” “And here it is again.” The boss said, “Someone kicked over my bike.” I said, “I’ll go set it upright right away.” At night, someone asked, “What does your boss actually do at night?” “He goes night cycling. My boss loves riding his bike at night.” Only those who truly understand can move ahead. I’m not at home. Yang Di, can you go to my place? Go pick up my green onions—they’ve arrived. The green onions are here. Yeah, they’ve got green onions at their place again. Late at night. Bought green onions late at night. We have to eat them right away. The boss from Shandong. We can’t not eat these green onions today, okay? They’re here. I’ll let you off this time. Hello? Boss, my food’s here. Okay. The food’s here. The silliness is here. The vinegar’s here. Don’t give me any more. No more food. Even if it arrives or spills, it’s not allowed. Everything’s here. No, that’s not it. Yang Di. If you bring vinegar to the office again, I’ll smash your bottle of vinegar. Broken The vinegar bottle broke. Alright. It hasn’t arrived yet. The boss said you should get yourself ready to make your debut. Xin Hao Not bad. This one from Xin Hao— Add two points! He’s debuted! That’s good. Give Xin Hao two more points for this one. He’s made his debut! Your boss is Du Hua, isn’t she? Yeah. That’s really good. Add two points. Next up, we’re still doing a new starting letter. This time, it’s— Someone says a word. Then you guess what it means. And act it out. Alright, three, two, one—go! What? What’s that? Is that a K? X K? What does that mean? X K? Small mouth? Smiling mouth? If you watch “The Swordsman Doesn’t Work”— I’ll forgive you. What kind of girlfriend is this? I’m Chen Duling’s ex-boyfriend. That’s awesome. Congratulations, Duling! Duling… Duling… I feel like crying. Hung up. She hung up. Great. That works too. Yeah, that’s right. I’ll break up with you after class tomorrow, okay? Xinhao, we’ve already broken up. Do we have to break up twice to be exes? I’ll break up with you after class today. Xinhao, it’s already over. Ex. I’ll look for you after class tomorrow. Okay. Yeah. Sure. Got it. Even when I’m gone, keep smiling. Okay. It’s best if it’s just the two of us. Let’s act out that scene. Alright. Hello? Hi. Are you my ex? I’m about to pass out. I’ll be right there to save you. Now that’s right. Hey, can we watch another movie? Whose movie? Xu Ke’s. Come on, let’s go. What if Xu Ke comes looking for me then? Did he come looking for you? No. Then just say it’s nothing. Yeah, we’ll just say it was Xu Ke. Xin Ke. Chen Xin Ke. Let’s go. I heard the director of our next film is Chen Xin Ke. Seriously? Who even is Chen Xinke? Come here, explain yourself properly. Come on. You probably don’t have any chance to work with Director Kexin. Chen Kexin. Let’s pause the competition for a second. Come on, Xu, our leading man. This newcomer to the entertainment industry— I know who Chen Kexin is. Chen Xinke is— This newcomer in the entertainment industry— He just landed his first leading role, and he’s already talking to Director Chen Xinke like that? Are you sure you haven’t been fooled? Who is Chen Xinke, anyway? Chen Xinke is— Chen Kexin. So it’s Chen Kexin? Then who is Chen Xinke? Chen Xinke is a rising star, a new director. A new director. Sorry, Director Chen, just kidding. Sorry, Director Chen. Let’s keep going. Come on. I’ve got another one. Hurry, save me, I’m almost out of blood! Blood card I don’t have much blood left. I don’t think this counts. This still doesn’t count. Nope, doesn’t count. Brother Di Okay, I’ll answer. Hey, ex. I left my little card at your place. Can you bring it over to me? The card? Sure thing. I’ll send it to you. Alright. There it is, Yang Chaoyue again. Here, let me answer the phone. Hey, ex. Hello? I want to drive your car. Want to drive it? I already gave it to you. No, this one’s not better than mine. That was honestly a bit much. That thing at your place… That… whatever it is. That car is so cool. Can I borrow it again? Didn’t I already give you a car? You want this one too? You want this one as well? I’ll just give you both. Awesome. It’s like a soap opera. Alright, let’s go. We’ve already broken up. You still want to come to my place? You’re a rare visitor. My graphics card is at your place, can you bring it over? How many of my things have you taken? Keep going. My graphics card. You two are really something. Hey, ex. I want to see a photo of your current partner. I don’t have a current partner. Okay, that’s fine, next. Guess what brand my clothes are. No way. Alright, our first round of the strength assessment is now complete. The ones who understood it best were always Chaoyue, Dige, and their group. They really got it. Quite a few people didn’t really get it. That approach doesn’t work. I gave my ex what was given to me—what’s wrong with that? It was handmade by Chen Xin Keqin. Your brand should be “Xueke”—the “Xueke” brand. The “Xueke” brand. Alright, thanks everyone. This was our first time playing this game. I have to mention Yang Chaoyue— I don’t know why, but when it comes to the ‘calling your ex’ part, she’s really good at it. She seems very experienced with it. Also, she really likes cars. She still wanted to play another round, but said “It’s over, let’s play again next time.” What does she like? Cars and graphics cards. As her ex, I saw her take both cars and the graphics card. And even the small graphics card. Basically, she took everything to her place—there was nothing left. (Same as above; already incorporated in previous line for fluency.) That’s for sure. Chaoyue and Dige caught on pretty well. Now, let’s look at the final scores. Yan Ya team scored a total of 27 points. The Xia Ke team scored 25 points. Congratulations to the Yan Ya team. Would each team please send one person to the shop. Let’s take a look at Xiaole’s scratch card first. How many points did Xiaole scratch off? Xiaole scratched off seven points. Seven points! No way! One? Seven? Are you sure you saw that right? Seven points, really. Alright, then our character moves forward one space. We also move forward one space. After all that scratching, it’s still just one space forward. Alright. Okay, thank you everyone. Welcome back. Now, let’s start our second round. As a convenience store employee, you need to be observant and perceptive. This round is all about observation. Each team will take turns performing a scripted scene. While one team acts, the other team observes. One member of the acting team will have a script that’s different from the rest. After the performance, the observing team gets three chances to ask the actors questions. Their goal is to figure out which member had the different script. That member. If they guess right, they earn a point. If they’re wrong, the acting team gets the point. The team with the most points at the end wins. Let’s decide which team will act first and which will observe. We’ll go first, that’s fine. Okay, our performance group that is, our friends from the Yan Ya team is already behind the elaborate props Actors, please come on stage What’s going on with the first friend? Yang Di. Show us how he got stuck in the door. Isn’t this a classic variety show gag? You mean the one where his head falls off, right? Right. I was just thinking, “That’s such an old bit.” Alright, everyone should have their script in front of them now. (see above) Be sure not to look at anyone else’s script. Take a moment to get familiar with your script. Remember, your performance should be energetic. Feel free to mix things up a little. Don’t let the others over here guess what you’re doing. Is Yang Di pretending to be someone who can’t understand the script? That’s another classic variety show gag. Alright, Yang Di, why don’t you show us how it’s done? Go ahead and start your performance. A modeling team should look like that. The “Red Sorghum” Modeling Team. No, that’s not it. This is. Shadow puppets. That’s way too abstract. These shadow puppets have gone wild. It kind of looks like shadow puppets. Come back after ten more years of practice, kid. It’s a showdown. Shadow puppet showdown. Now the pressure’s on Ms. Chen Duling. Let’s welcome her. Bodybuilding. A bodybuilding competition. Look, Di-ge is still acting like he’s different. Di-ge This doesn’t really look like dancing. What she’s doing looks more like exercise. Don’t be ridiculous. This is Chen Duling’s dance, for real. It really is a dance. But it’s also kind of like exercise. I’m so confused. How is it exercise one minute and dance the next? Do you have that many lines to say? Go home and practice for another ten years, kid. You always say the same thing. Alright, let’s welcome Yunlai. Breakdancing. Floor moves. This is pretty much the same. They all have push-ups. He should be doing it like me. I don’t think so—are you an undercover agent or something? Go home and practice for another ten years, kid. He’s different from the others—no one else pointed at me. No one else pointed at me. This is a face-off from the male lead. Yang Chaoyue can’t wait any longer. Yang Chaoyue Unbelievable! Yang Chaoyue is actually the best dancer. Why does it feel like there are cooking motions in there? Yeah. Wait a second, your chestnuts are almost ready. There really is some real cooking skill here. This one’s the same. This one’s the same. I’m really curious about this script. Kid, you need to practice for another ten years. Still talking about you. Or is it me? Alright, you can ask three questions. Pick three people to ask. Ask Yang Di. Hi. That’s exactly what I wanted to ask. I’ve been wanting to ask for a long time. Now that you’ve just finished acting, do you think… …you could replace me as the male lead? So you’re saying… So, the sequel is already confirmed? That’s what you wanted to ask, right? Okay, go ahead. You can ask why you didn’t do that move. Or why you did. You can ask that question, right? Take a moment to think about it. You just made our crew look kind of dumb. Let me ask Yunlai about this one. Why are you so handsome? No, that’s not what I meant. What a waste. Why did you point at me and say, “Bro, come back after practicing for ten years”? Bro, come back after practicing for ten years. I give off leading man vibes. What does “leading man vibe” mean? It means being the leading man. When he acts, he really brings the character to life. You wouldn’t understand. You’re not an actor like us. There goes another question wasted. We still have one more question. Forget it. Give up. Come on, just give up. Give up. There are three more people after you. I really can’t figure it out. They’re acting way too abstractly. So, are you giving up? No, I’m still thinking. Yang Chaoyue Are you doing this just to make people laugh? No, I mean, in your script, are you doing these things to make people laugh? That’s a bit forward of you. How am I being forward just by asking about your script? I’m just doing my job—and it’s a tough one, too. (see above; merged for fluency) You five, discuss and come up with an answer. Whose script is different from the other three? I’ll give you ten seconds to give me an answer. I vote for Yang Chaoyue. I think Yang Chaoyue is trying to throw us off. I think Chen Duling’s is a bit different. I feel like it’s Chen Duling. I think it’s either Yang Di or Chen Duling. So it’s Chen Duling and Yang Di who are different. Chen Duling. Alright, let’s do this. Give us another five-second countdown. It’s your turn now. Let’s see who you vote for as the third vote. We’ve decided: Chen Duling. Chen Duling. Chen Duling, please read your script. Today, I finally mustered up the courage to step into the aerobics room at the gym singing and dancing my way through an aerobics routine After finishing, I moved to the side where one of the onlookers said “Come back after practicing for another ten years, little brother.” Alright, could the remaining three people please read your scripts aloud together Then we’ll know who’s got it right Okay? Roles: The observation group got it right. That’s one point for them. I was way too obvious, that’s the main thing. But that’s okay. As soon as the push-ups came up, If I’d known, I wouldn’t have done any exercise. I should’ve just done something like aerobics or whatever. But oh well, Alright, let’s move on to round two. Time to switch roles. Actors, please come on stage. Why is this part so awesome? Next, we’re about to start reading the script. Let’s get started. Xu Zhisheng Why are you clenching your hand so tight? You look so nervous. I’m getting into character, trying to find my role. Stop interrupting me. I’m seriously reading the script. I think you might have a bit of a reading problem. You’re still reading, huh? Yeah, exactly. You can already see it at this point. You can already get a hint. Some people just take forever to read. Maybe it’s just too many words for them. Like Xu Zhisheng here. Look, It’s just that my eyes are small. You’re not flipping through three pages in there, are you? Are you ready, Mr. Leading Man? Alright. Alright, contestant number one, Xu Zhisheng, please come forward. You may begin your performance. What’s this? “Prison Break.” You may speak. Forgot the lyrics. You’ve been staring at it for ages. Oh, right, I forgot. On the set of “The Outlaw’s Way Doesn’t Work” Does stuff like this happen there too? Hey, wake up! I haven’t seen such a lousy performance in ages. Relax. They’ll edit it out later. You can’t edit that out. Like when you were in that “Gallant Wanderer Goes Nowhere” show… Is that what you told the director too? I’m performing in “Chivalry Doesn’t Work.” There aren’t as many people around to distract me. Guess it’s all our fault. Maybe you shouldn’t even show it to the audience after you’re done filming. Wake up, now! Do you hear me? You, wake up! Open your eyes right now! Do you hear me?! In this scene It seems like you knocked this person out. Did you knock this person out? Guess. Want me to do it again? Will it be better this time? I’m usually better on the second try. Awesome, I’d love to see it again. Please welcome actor number one, Xu Zhisheng. Please take the stage again. Do you think he’ll forget his lines again? He forgot his lines again. He definitely forgot his lines again. Wake up! Wake up! I’m ordering you to wake up! I know. I’m thinking. The emotion. Sorry. I’m not in the right mood. I can’t deliver my lines. I’m not in the right mood. Even if I say the lines, it won’t mean anything. Hurry up and act, we’re all almost there emotionally. He just can’t get into the right emotional state. We’re all already in the right mood. Wake up! You— You, wake up! Do you hear me? Do you hear me? Get out! Thank you. You’re welcome. You should say sorry. Please welcome the actors Jingyi, Wang Mian, and Wang Shuai. Are we supposed to laugh or… what? Get out of the car. Get out of the car. How come you have a car? I bought it myself. I took the train here, the high-speed rail. You just skipped everything that came before. No, nothing. Not at all. I command you: wake up! I command you: open your eyes right now, do you hear me? I command you. Wake up right now, do you hear me? Okay. Here’s the first question I’m really curious about. Is it okay if I ask Xu Zhisheng a question? Who are you up against? Opponent? Not really. Okay, that’s a good answer too. Let me ask, in what situation is this opponent? No, let me follow up. Let me follow up. His answer is too focused on the opponent. That would be a second question. A follow-up is already a second question. Is this the one? I don’t think Zhisheng is playing the “bossy CEO.” Look. I didn’t see it. But one of you got out of the car, another straightened his collar, and someone else did a sliding kneel. You three must be playing the “bossy CEO.” As for him, I have no idea what he’s supposed to be. Zhisheng is probably the counterpart to the “bossy CEO” archetype. Maybe something like a “general” or a “king”. And there wasn’t even a fight— only he was pretending to fight someone. Did you notice? Let me ask, Are you playing a historical figure? No, I’m not. Are you playing an athlete? No, I’m not. You really couldn’t tell what I was acting as? How could we possibly tell if it was a historical figure or an athlete? Is it Xu Zhisheng? But maybe it’s not him. Because Xu Zhisheng always acts in such an abstract way. What’s that supposed to mean? Don’t criticize my acting career. As for the last three, after they arrived, that person was already there. The three of them might have been working really closely together, like they’d planned it in advance. Their tactic was just to stall for time. Xu Zhisheng used a hilariously bad performance to help them buy time. Just make your guesses, but stop constantly commenting. There’s no need to keep critiquing. No need. When your show airs, the live comments will be just like this. We’re just letting you get used to it now, to desensitize you. Teacher, I’m just here to promote the show. Chen Duling, just pick one at random. Duling. (Myself.) Are you serious? Yeah. What do you think of Xu Zhisheng? Xu Zhisheng, why don’t you read the script? I noticed Duling really gets my acting style. Check your character. Boss. Boss. We’ve got underlings behind us. The three of us are the “domineering CEOs.” Just as I thought. Chaoyue’s guess was right on the money. Chaoyue also understands my acting. Next time, let’s team up for the first time. Mainly because you have a big fight scene. Okay. Looks like we’re tied now. Go ahead, draw a card. So, how many steps does your team get? We move one step. Our Yan Ya team moves two steps. We scratched off a two. That’s awesome! The Yan Ya Team is currently in the lead. We’re entering the final round of the challenge. This round introduces a brand-new business line from the convenience store: food delivery. Food delivery. The delivery team will wear shoes that squeak like rubber chickens. They have to move the ball from one side to the other. You can only use parts of your body above your head. Each ball is worth a different number of points depending on its size. Each ball is worth a different number of points. The defending team will send two players to the interception zone. There, they’ll wear blindfolds. Once the delivery team crosses this line, they can place the ball in the target. But if the ball is intercepted, you have to go back and retrieve it. Pick two people to go. You guys pick. Xin Hao and the handsome guy, you’re up. Come on. Grab the blindfolds. And the interception sticks. How about this one? Look at these eyes— these are my brother’s eyes. Even Xin Hao can’t handle these eyes. Look at that. You’re really making fun of me. So we’re the ones who have to get past them, right? We need to deliver the item over there. Hurry up and get over there! Then I’ll step on it down here. Distract them. I’ll distract him. But don’t our heads have to… Yeah. Let’s go. Elephant trunk—bend over, head down. One, two, three, four, five. Quick, find the acupressure mat! Back up. Turn around. Turn back. What did you do next? Turn around. Everyone dribbling, get ready. Ready, three, two, one, go! Yes, that’s it, sweep like that. Sweep side to side. Yang Di! Hey Di, what are you doing? Right, just go a bit further forward and you’ll reach it. Go forward a little. Go forward. A little more forward. Keep going forward. A bit more forward. Hit it forward. Hit. Guide. No, get up. Yeah, awesome! That’s the way, go back! I got hit! There’s one! A hobbit’s coming over! Another hobbit’s coming! To the left! No! No, that’s not it. You two, over here. Come on, let’s butt heads! Let’s go for the big one. Just the two of us will take the big one. Use your head! Push forward! Hold still. Wait, don’t move yet. Go! Alright. Go! You two are at it again. Let me butt heads with you. Brother Di, it’s me, your humble servant. I’m lucky today. I can try my luck too. Stick one in your ear. Tuck one in your hair. Lift your hair up. Your hair—on your head. To the right—looking good, to the right. To the left. To the right. To the left. Feels like a gust of wind just blew by. Quit chatting. Right. Left. Right. Who? Right. You two are at it again. To the right. Right. You two, step forward. Yeah, that’s it. Stop. Hold still. Don’t move. When I say ‘fight,’ just fight. Don’t move. Right there! Shuai, move a little to the right. A bit more to the right. To the right. Who? Shuai, move right. Xinhao, move left. Go! Dige doesn’t find it challenging anymore. We’re a bit short on props here. We could actually add a few more. Who? Who, me? Who’s this? Who? These two are no help at all. Time’s up! Take off your blindfolds and look back. They’re full. When did that happen? We’re out of balls. Not a single one was caught. Who? Teacher. I have a suggestion. Let’s switch to a new batch of balls. Because Di-ge just had them in his mouth. For the counting part, who’s doing it? You. Me? I need gloves. Unbelievable. I’ll count. There are two that are the biggest. There are four spiky balls: one, two, three, four. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight in total. Thirty-five, thirty-six. Thirty-seven. Thirty-seven in total. Wild Goose Team. As expected, they received a high score. They scored a total of fifty-three points. This director is really brave. It’s got to be our director team. This is the first time I truly understand what it means to not be afraid of getting dirty or working hard. Okay Di-ge, Yunlai, please put on your blindfolds. Let’s spin around five times like an elephant. Listen for my countdown. Five Four Three Two One Alright, go! Over here, Di-ge, this way! This is the front. Yes, that’s good. Go ahead! He still manages to hit himself. There’s no one on your side. There’s no one on your side for now. There’s no one on your side right now, Di-ge. Alright, I’m calm now. Turn to your left. It’s dangerous on Yunlai’s side. Everyone wants to head that way. That’s enough. Left! Wait! Right! That’s good, Wang Mian. Right! Left! Jingyi is really giving it her all—Jingyi really is! Move forward On your right Careful on your right This is tough Hold on You’re still making noise To your right Hit it On your left Watch out on the right Right side Be careful on the right Watch out on the right Right side On your right Right-hand side It’s on your right Right-hand side Right hand Xin Hao You can’t Alright Use your head, it’s above Above you Many hands make light work As long as you stay positive There’s always a way Hit forward Hit it Go forward On your right Right hand All of you, go back Go back Did we get it? We got it! They knocked the whole pool out of place. The whole pool got knocked away. Now the pool’s gone. The pool’s behind us now. It’s gone. Hold on a sec. How did you end up in there? Does that count? It got hit. Quick, bring it back! Then get it back. Hurry, get it back! Let’s carry it again. Hurry up! Hurry, we still have time to bring it back! Man, it’s heavy! Three, two, one, go! How sad! We have to carry it back again. So embarrassing, come on! Let’s go! To the right! Over here, by me! Nice one! This one’s coming over. What’s this look? To the left! Hit it! Who did you hit? I’m so tired. They played really well. They didn’t play well. We moved the whole thing over. Wasn’t that intense? Aren’t we tough? So intense! We hit this one. Their group’s area is cleaner. This one’s big. Really big. Big one. There are five, six, seven, eight, nine spiky balls in total. Small ball. There are quite a few small balls. Look at my hair. I brought it over. He hid it in his hair. His hair looks just like a hedgehog. Forty-seven. Forty-seven small balls in total. If it’s just small balls, doesn’t that mean we win? Alright, it’s our final round. The result is obvious. Yan Ya team: 53 points. Xia Ke team: 73 points. Xia Ke team wins this round! Awesome! Everyone knows the drill. Let’s send someone. Time to reveal the results! Wait, what’s this? I’m Xiao Lechi. We’re… All done scratching. Looks like I got a one. Two. Two. Two. You guys too? One step, then another. What a pity. I never got sent to the penalty room. After three rounds of competition In the end, on our strength ranking, the Yan Ya team came out on top. They won extra time for drama promotion. As a reward, they get to swap roles and perform iconic scenes. The male and female leads will switch roles to reenact famous scenes from the drama. Let’s take a look at the video first. Let’s quickly review the iconic scenes. If Lord Fu doesn’t mind, I’ll do whatever you ask. Is this all you have left? Other than this scarred body, I have nothing else to offer. Now, let’s turn the stage over to Duling and Yunlai. Let’s get started! If Lord Fu does not find me beneath you, I’m willing to do whatever you ask of me. Is this all I have left to offer? Other than this battered, scarred body, I have nothing left to give. Lord Fu, you’ve protected me so many times. Other than that, I can’t think of any other reason why. I’m no saint. Are you really okay with this? I am. Someone did a kabedon (slammed their hand against the wall to pin someone in). Everyone’s really getting into character. So… Di-ge I actually forgot. Really… Which parts are we playing? I’ll play the male character. You play Lord Fu. Okay. Di-ge, you don’t have to take it off. We also… We can act without taking it off. I need to get into the role. Just now, Yunlai… only bared one shoulder. Both his shoulders slipped down. For Hanyan, it’s better to bare both shoulders like this. If Lord Fu doesn’t mind, you can have me do anything. So this is your last resort? Other than this scarred body of mine, That line is really convincing. Don’t listen to those distractions. I have no more bargaining chips. You actually think this is a bargaining chip? Lord Fu. Lord Fu, over here. Is there anyone else besides you? Why do I hear so many voices? No. Lord Fu has protected me time and again. I can’t think of any other reason. Scalding hot Okay then Looks like I need to exfoliate I’ve never claimed to be a good guy Are you really doing this of your own free will? He couldn’t be more willing I’m in As long as you help me Sorry. That’s not how it is in the actual play. But boss, I really mean it, Every time I have to act out these scenes, I really have issues with them. You know what I mean? The food I bought here last time tasted terrible. I’d like a refund. Alright. Give me my money back. Alright. Let’s go back in and see if there’s anything good to eat. Hey, boss, come out here. Please, just a moment. We just got some new stock in. Let me see. Real Fruit & Flower Milkshake. Don’t worry, give it a try. A light floral scent mixed with real fruit bits. One sip and you can’t put it down. Tastes good, right? We also have… It’s really good! Strawberry and hibiscus flavor. You should try this one too. It’s okay, I’ll take them all. Alright. Now I’m not upset anymore. Yan Ya Team. You’ll be entering the warehouse soon. Where you’ll face the ultimate challenge. According to the records, last time, the top team had six people. Six people. We just need to find two more people to join us. Some people were really jumping around just now. They said they were really jealous of us. Don’t be jealous. Let’s do it together. Are we all going to the dark room together? Let’s make it even scarier inside than it already is. Pick one more person. No, just pick one. Two people. We’re still one person short. Some people… Wang Mian is already gone. No. I’m actually just a guest on this show. I could actually go in there too. Right? But your acting is really impressive. I heard it’s really scary in there. I’m not going in. Are you scared? I heard it’s really scary. I just like people who react like this. So, Wang Mian… Alright. Let’s go take a break at the snack bar first. Those heading to the warehouse can go now. I’m so excited. Let’s go. Are you guys scared? I don’t know. I don’t play this much. Alright, everyone. First, we need to… Why are you grabbing someone else’s partner? I don’t have a partner of my own. Alright, everyone. Before we go into the warehouse, we have to shout. Our work slogan. It’s written right here. With passion! Just like this— Come on. Together. Want to succeed? Enter the warehouse! Walk the path of a model employee. Walk the actor’s path. Hold on. Wait, can’t we even say this together? What’s the matter? The actor’s path? Now they’re looking down on us. No, I don’t know about that. We’re just from the small shop. Right. Let’s try again from the top. Ready? Go! Want to succeed? Enter the warehouse! Walk the path of a model employee. Want to get rich? Laugh out loud! The road to riches is a blast! Open the door, please! No one’s been in this warehouse for twenty years. It’s not like it used to be. The spiders in here are terrifying. They’re really busy. As soon as you walk in, they start scurrying around. Why did it get so dark? Who’s there? Mian, hurry up! Di, he stepped on me! What’s on my head? Why is there someone here? And why is there someone right next to me? Who is it? It’s not a person. It’s a… It’s just a rubber chicken. It’s fine. I feel like someone’s here. Feels like there are people everywhere, man. I’m here. You can get up now. Who is it? Why aren’t you saying anything? Whose leg am I touching? Yang Di? Hi, you three. We’re here to work in the warehouse. Say something. Who are you? Say something. You three. Who are you? We are employees. We are employees. Who told you to come in? The boss told us to come in. This is a restricted area—warehouse only. No wandering around without permission. All of you, inside. Move! Get in. Hey, Sparky. You need a break. You’ve been up all night. Get in there. All of you, inside. Come on, move it! This way. Over here. This way. Unbelievable. Why is it so dark? What is this place? What are you doing? I can’t take this… Hey, bro… Hey, bro… Hey, whoever’s pulling my shirt, go easy! You’re about to strip me naked! Come here. Everyone, line up and stand straight. Alright, let’s get moving. Everyone, line up in a row. Quickly! What is this? This is our shop’s pride and honor. These six outstanding chief employees have made tremendous contributions to our shop’s growth. They have rendered outstanding service. Three of them are actually me. You are here today to learn from and emulate their successful experiences. Strive to become outstanding employees like them. Are you confident? Yes, we are! Yes! Great. In front of you are five boxes— these are the tools they’ve left behind for you. So, do you think we have more people now? Not really. Not really? Don’t talk while I’m speaking. I see the two of you You two look like a match made in heaven. You’re such a shipper. In a moment, you two will open this box for pairs. You two are the pair. Li Shipper-sheng, Li Shipper-si Shipper-sheng, Shipper-si If you two are tied together, you should be right up against each other. Completely stuck together. Next up. Guo Laofei Guo Laofei, with thirty years on the job. The steadiest hand in the warehouse. What are you looking at, Li? I’m Li, and I’m here to do the job. Ren Ma has forty-five years of work experience. You’re lucky. This is the treatment device. Let me help you put it on. Does it go on your hand or your face? Hand. On your face. You’re so mean! Oh no. You… Does everything look different now? Can you still see? I can see. You’re all upside down. All of you are upside down! Come here, let me see how far away you are. I can’t really tell how far away you are. I can’t even touch your face. I’m not there yet. I’m here. But it’s still so far away. Yours is good. What’s good about it? Do you want it? I don’t want it. You’re the one with the therapy device. Here, take it. Don’t mess with the settings yourself. See, I’m not even moving. It makes you start dancing. Everything’s vibrating now. It’s like the robot dance. Some people even sing while wearing this. It all sounds like electronic music. Alright, we’re all suited up now. Did you get yours on? I put it on as soon as I got up, because I felt nauseous. I felt like I was going to throw up. You go ahead and put yours on first. I’m wearing it backwards. Yeah, backwards. Doesn’t matter. Like this is fine. We’re all dressed and ready to go. Ready to work hard in the warehouse, no complaints. Great. You’ve already got the hang of what it takes to be a great employee. Now, in this room, find your uniforms. I’m not going to be too close to him, am I? I’m a little… No, it’s alright. I’m about to file a complaint against you. Find your uniforms. Come on, find your uniforms. Put your uniforms on and take your seats at your workstations. Come on, hurry up. This one’s for two people. Two people. This is for the two of us. It must be ours. What’s that? Huh? What is this? Good thing I didn’t see it just now. I don’t know. They’re connected. Are we facing the wrong way? Let me see. Uh… What do you mean? And there are NPCs (non-player characters) too. I’m okay. I can’t see clearly. Is this a piece of clothing? These glasses don’t work well for distance. Can you pass it to me? Here, right here. My eyes are a bit… Down a bit. It’s right here. Alright. Let’s take a break. This one right here. Hurry up! Hey bro, can you help me open this box? There’s nothing inside the box. Hey bro, is there anything in that trash can? I found my work uniform. What about mine? Hey, do you think it might be in there? There’s someone in there. Yeah, someone’s inside. Is he wearing it? Looks like the clothes are next to him. Is that your uniform? Sorry, excuse me. Sorry. Let me see. Who are you supposed to be? Li Laizuo. Man, you look awesome! I was just about to… I’m not afraid of anything. Don’t try to trick me. Hey, what about mine? Not yet. It’s right there. There it is. We just pulled it out a second ago. There’s still one inside. Wait, there’s another one. Here’s another one. I’m worried about plugging in this microwave. You know, right now I… Three, two, one. Yeah, that’s it. Excuse me. Sorry to trouble you. Boss, it’s just me now. No, not yet. Have another look. Let me check again. This one. My pants. Aren’t these pants a bit too embarrassing? These pants were made just for you. Even Guo Laofei wears them. You’re the best of the six. Can you see it? Yeah, I can see. They’re inside out, you’re helping me with this. You’re the best. Turn it around. That’s it. There you go, now it’s right. Alright. Yep, that’s good. Is everyone ready? All set. I’m too fat. Seriously, I’m too fat. Quick! Let me try them on. I’m all set. Good, very good. You’ve all come to appreciate the essence of an outstanding employee. So next, we need to put into practice the star-level performance they’ve demonstrated. What does that look like? This is the star badge. Each of you needs to take out the star without breaking it and remove it within three minutes If you don’t finish in time— No one can leave. This one’s for you. And this one’s for you. We have two of them. Yeah, because there are two of you. So, what do we do? Just carve out this five-pointed star. But you can’t crack the star. What do you mean? I can’t see right now. I can’t even find it by touch. I blew it right from the start. Li, what are you staring at? I have high hopes for you. You can do it. Okay. I really think you’ve got great potential. Give it your best! You can’t even get something this simple right? How can you call yourself a good employee? You mess up so easily. Who’s calling out? I can’t see a thing from here. Let the outside rot. I’m falling apart. I’m falling apart. I’m splitting apart. Can’t even get something this simple right. Again. Mine shattered too. Again. I’m falling apart too. Li Kesi is falling apart too. That broke too. You messed up again. I messed up again. I’m just numb. I’m really numb. Again. Again. Will this work? I have no idea either. Can anyone actually succeed? It fell apart again. You guys really have seen it or not Really? Yeah You can eat this. It’s okay to eat. Yeah, you can eat it. He said it’s okay to eat. Is this edible? You’re actually eating it? So brave. Sorry, just giving myself a treat. I gotta hand it to you. Let’s try again. Again. Teacher, mine broke. Again. Hand it in. Teacher. You said so. It broke again. Let’s start over. Alright. Everyone, listen up. (omitted for fluency; combined with previous line) As long as one person from your team passes, I’ll let your whole team pass. Alright? Okay. Mian-ge, you’re our best hope. Sorry, can I get another one? It’s already snapped. Who has the best shot now? I think I do. I’m still twenty cents short. I’m still twenty cents short, guys. Take this away. You can’t bite into it. It’s still whole. Bro, you’re not supposed to gnaw out the star. The outer ring needs to stay intact. No, we want the star. We need a complete star. We don’t want the outer ring. It’s the star we want. All we want is the star. Leader, I did it! I really did it! Let me have a look. Leader, give me some face, please. Alright, I’ll let you pass. Well done. Everyone, stand up! On your feet! Form a straight line. You’ve passed this stage’s test. You may now proceed to the next room. Turn left. Let’s go. Alright, off you go to the next room. Let’s go. Move forward three steps. Wow, is this hallway really this long? Uh… This one? Here… Everyone, Here… Di, let’s go in. Di. This is so scary. Is anyone here? I can’t see. There’s someone here. I can’t see, so I’m not scared. It’s because of my eyes. What’s this? It’s a sofa. Whose place is this? Sitting on the sofa. There’s someone on the left side. No, there isn’t! On the left! I’m telling you, there’s someone on the left! No, there isn’t anyone! Who are you? Come on, who are you? There’s something weird about your face mask. It’s so green. Yeah, it’s even glowing. One at a time! It’s so noisy in here. Li Chousha, what are you looking at? You’re the one looking. Who are you? My name is Li Chousha. (Li “What-are-you-looking-at”) Who are you? Come on, tell me! Li Chousha. My name is Li Chousha. (Li “What-are-you-looking-at”) Alright, everyone quiet down. I didn’t say anything! I’ll go first and introduce myself. Welcome to Director Aimeili’s room. Here, I’m in charge of keeping everyone looking their best, and I’ve been here the longest. I’m also the boss around here. You worked at Disney, didn’t you? Why are you clapping? She seems a bit… …like she’s got “lead poisoning” or something. Alright, that’s enough. I’m actually scared now. Don’t talk to me right now. Next, you can only leave if you meet my standards and tidy up your appearance before you can leave. Alright. Come here, let me take a look at your faces. I’ll check each of you, one at a time. You. You. You. You three have the most issues. Does that mean me too? Yeah, you, bro. Of course you are. How could it not? But saying “of course” is a bit harsh, isn’t it? Don’t you have any self-awareness? Honestly. Out of the three of us, who’s got the weakest basics? Why do the three of us always have to No way. compete everywhere we go? You really have no clue, do you? So, it’s him. Do I have to name names? No, just one—him. Stop. Quiet, everyone. Now, get into pairs and sit over there. In pairs. Then I’ll team up with Wang Mian. Zhisheng. Zhisheng, you’re with me. You’re with me. Next, I’ll give you some time. Follow my instructions and do each other’s makeup. You’ll only pass if you create a look that meets my standards. That’s the only way you’ll pass the assessment. Exceed expectations. You still haven’t shown up bare-faced, have you? Okay, everyone should have your cosmetics now. You all have your makeup, right? Everyone’s got them? Alright, let’s get started. That’s way too much color. Check out this group. That’s pretty impressive. Pretty good. You two are something else. We’ve been putting on makeup this whole time. It’s all on video. Teacher. Looks like Yang Di could replace you. Oh, really? Alright, stop, stop. Next up is the lipstick round. You still get two minutes. Put lipstick on your partner. Time starts now. Are you ready? Go! Hurry up! Come on! Just a second. You look even worse like that. All set. Come on, pucker up your lips first. Come on. Could you use this as lipstick? Isn’t this just wall putty? No, it isn’t. Isn’t this…? Isn’t this the stuff you use to patch walls? Hey, don’t lick that! Your little mouth… Looks like it’s been poisoned. Don’t lick it! Di, this stuff is definitely toxic. This is definitely toxic. Happy birthday! This is definitely toxic. My lips really hurt. My lips really hurt. Teacher, did you notice that after the light came on, you got a bit awkward? Oh, really? Good thing it’s red. Chen Duling doesn’t need to do herself up like that. Just look at her. Teacher, is anyone even keeping an eye on her? How is this any different from just putting on makeup in the morning? How does she keep getting prettier? Everyone finished with their makeup? Alright, everyone, come over here. My heart aches. I’m forty already. Line up. I’m so jealous of you actors. We variety show people… Are we in the same segment? We’re definitely in the same segment. Alright, this round counts as passing. Now, with those faces… head to the next room. The next room And another room And another room We’re almost there It’s only eight rooms Each one is scarier than the last Why did you lock me in? I saw what you did What’s up? You’re just scaring yourself It’s okay Go on, mess with him! If no one’s sitting here, I’ll sit down. This is the relay challenge at the warehouse broadcast station. Please finish the final challenge here. The six employees are split into pairs. We’re pretty much finished. We’ve got Xu Zhisheng. And I’m here too. If we’re going in pairs, let’s stick with the same groups as before. Okay. Xu Zhisheng, you go first. Okay. If you make it, that’s it. Wait, are we sure this is it? Why is there nothing here? Maybe it’s not. Try pressing something at the front. Oh, here it is. Okay. I’m Ren Ma. And I’m— Li Laizuo. This group, please start again. Everyone else, please move to the waiting area. Come on, have a seat. Feels like it’s been a while, huh? Is this a countdown or something? Yeah, five minutes. You guys need to speed up. I’m Ren Ma. And I’m Li Laizuo. Welcome to today’s Warehouse Blessings show. Now for the weather forecast. Today, a storm called “Niuniu” is coming in from the Scandinavian Peninsula. (see above) Do you want to take a break first? Why don’t you guys rest for a bit? That’s pretty scary. It’s so loud in here. Uh… I guess I’m Ren Ma? And I’m… Li Laizuo? (I think?) Welcome to today’s Warehouse Good News. And now, the weather forecast. Kizilsu Kirghiz Autonomous Prefecture, Atushi, reporting from the Bulake Village warehouse branch. There’s been a noticeable drop in temperature. Please dress appropriately to avoid catching a cold. (see above; combined for fluency) Moving on to the next segment. Did we switch scripts, or is it still this one? No, we’ve changed it. I’m Lee Crasheng. I’m Lee Crashsi. Yesterday, at the mysterious warehouse, a logistics dispute broke out. Warehouse employee Li Lala and Dai Lala the owner of the logistics company, Old Li—wait, not Li, no, he can’t see. Let’s have this group start over. Let’s start again. I’m Lee Crasheng. I’m Lee Crashsi. Welcome to today’s warehouse radio. Now, here’s a warehouse update. Yesterday, at the mysterious warehouse, a logistics dispute broke out. Li Lala is moving house, and he only has one Labrador. You two, get ready to start over. Why? Because one minute isn’t enough time. Teaming up with Old Li and Dai Lala, they decided to seek help from the warehouse logistics department. Alright, that’s good. Hurry, there’s hope! Two professional hosts— both certified! I’m Li Chousha. I’m Guo Laofei. Welcome to today’s warehouse radio show. Now, an employee bulletin: Yesterday, convenience store employee You… Your reading is just awful. I can’t stand it anymore. While You Jiemu was working at the shop, a horse suddenly charged into the corner shop. Hello, everyone in the warehouse! This is Li Chousha. And I’m Guo Laofei. Welcome to today’s warehouse radio show. Now for a quick staff update. Yesterday, shop employee You Jiemu was on duty when a horse suddenly ran into the shop. A masked hero dashed in and averted disaster. He tamed the wild horse and rode off into the distance. Afterwards, You Jiemu, still excited, shouted toward the distant figure, Oh, horse-taming man, you are bold and strong Your galloping steed races like the wind The boundless plains let you wander as you please Your heart is as vast as the sea and the land Oh, horse-taming man We were so close Time’s up! First group, please return to the studio Let’s start over That NPC (non-player character)… All our buttons are missing We’ll get on it in a moment and open it up Make sure it doesn’t close again Ding-dong! Ready, go! Welcome to today’s Warehouse Blessings Here’s the weather forecast Today’s Yimbulage and Barunbaga, Bayan Nur Tuyrao Why did they have those two do this? And then invade Kizil This is Ren Ma. This is Li Laizuo. Welcome to today’s Warehouse Good News. And now for the weather forecast. Kizilsu Kirghiz Autonomous Prefecture. Atushi City, within the Autonomous Prefecture. Azak Yuku Ryi Ishtazi Village. In addition, in Chabuchaer Xibe Autonomous County, Sunzhaqi Niulu, and the warehouse branch in Qiejibulake Village. Temperatures have dropped significantly. Please dress appropriately to prevent catching a cold. Let her come out. Come join the broadcast. Should I open it for her? She won’t let me. She doesn’t want it opened. You two can start the broadcast now. This is All done Li Kesheng This is Li Kesi Welcome to today’s warehouse radio show Now for a warehouse newsflash Yesterday, at the mysterious warehouse a logistics dispute broke out Warehouse worker Li Lala and Li Laola, owner of Dailala Logistics got into an argument He asked Li Laola about Dailala whether Dailala delivers Labradors or not Li Laola replied that Dailala may or may not deliver Labradors it all depends on Dailala When it comes to delivering Labradors does Dailala deliver a lot of Labradors, or just a few? Li Laola and the Dailala team decided to seek help from the warehouse logistics department Alright, that’s a wrap This time, we really have to finish within two minutes I’m “Li Chousha” I’m “Guo Laofei” [Section break] Here’s a quick staff bulletin Yesterday, You Jiemu, an employee at the convenience store, was working when a horse suddenly barged into the store A masked hero rushed out and sprang into action, preventing any harm He subdued the wild horse and led it off into the distance Afterwards, still excited, You Jiemu called out to the figure as he disappeared into the distance Oh, horse-wrangling man, how mighty and strong you are! Your galloping steed races like the wind, The endless plains stretch out as you roam, And every day is as bright and clear as you. Congrats, everyone, on passing the final test! You all really made an impression. Please head back to the stage to get your prize. There’s a prize too? I don’t even want a prize anymore. Yeah, I really don’t want to go up there. I don’t want a prize. I want more money. I want to go home. Alright. There won’t be anything else on the way back, right? Nope, that’s it. That’s it. Really, that’s it. You scared me for a second. I’m gonna sue you guys! It feels just like being in class. How did it end up like this? I’m going to start acting too. I’m done recording shows. We worked ourselves to the bone, and this is what we get. They can’t even be bothered to buy us flowers. What is this? Is this fennel or something? For us? Giving us chrysanthemums, like we’re at a funeral. Should we just lie here, or what? Zhisheng and I have matching profile pictures now. Chaoyue looks pretty pleased. The makeup turned out really nice. I did her makeup for her. Just look at what she did to me. Look. I told you not to eat sweet potatoes that hot. After I finished her makeup, she even told me, “I feel like I just ate a super hot sweet potato.” I said, “You already ate the other half.” Actually, the best team only has four members from the Yan Ya team. We added two more people to our team. So we just talked it over with the directors and discussed it a bit. Maybe only the four original members should get the ‘Best Team’ award. So that’s how it is— if we do it this way, we won’t get anything. If you like, you can help me hold one too. Then we can give it to them together. Right. Congratulations to everyone for passing the top team assessment! Congratulations. Go ahead and take one. It really wasn’t easy. I just want to use one to cover my face. They even have this— so cool! Hey, where did the other trophy go? Who took it? It was just here. Oh well, never mind. “Sneaky artist” Xu Zhisheng, hand it over. Was it you? If not, then where is it? The cameras over here caught everything— there are cameras on this side, you know. Oops, I didn’t realize there were cameras over here. Come on, you’re unbelievable. Alright. Catch you next time! See ya! Friends, please don’t come. Today, I brought my castmates from the show with me to this program. What a wonderful time spent working together all thanks to them If Gou Lingfeng can begin as a complete newcomer to the jianghu and transform, step by step, Those who act with righteousness and generosity are xia; those who save others from peril are xia. And I… He’s destined to be a great hero. In the story, Zhuang Hanyan faces many challenges and hardships. With the support of his friends, he overcomes prejudice and discovers his own self-worth. So, wherever and whenever, we should always trust our teammates. They’ll always have your back. Just seeing you all makes me smile. I hope that in laughter, you’ll make even more friends.